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Mommyhood

September 12, 2014

Facing the Responsibility & Embracing Battles Lost

It’s no secret, y’all… Parenthood is hard. It’s so many sweet and happy times, but it’s soooooo much responsibility.

You come home from the hospital with this tiny little being who is completely and utterly dependent on you. It’s some pressure.

OliviaNewborn122_WEB

You worry, you don’t sleep much, and you love them more than you ever thought possible. You slowly get into a “groove” and most days feel like you’re coming out on top of the battle that is parenthood.

But then that teeny tiny little baby starts to grow, and you get to the point where you’re now not only trying to keep that baby alive and well, you’re trying to teach a little person how to be a good person. How to be patient, and kind, and respectful, and loving, and forgiving, and independent, and so so so many other things. You’re responsible for teaching your child how to be confident being themselves while also being a good member of the society they’ve come into.

It’s a lot. A LOT.

And sometimes? You feel like you’re still coming out on top of the battle that is parenthood.

And sometimes? You don’t.

Sometimes you have those days where you feel like each and every battle has been lost. You’ve lost patience. You’ve lost your temper. You’ve lost your confidence. You’ve lost that part of you that is a “fun” parent. You feel like you’ve lost your mind.

Those days… they suck. Plain and simple.

 

But, once you survive them, there’s an upside to those days. They are a place to grow from. They are a place to build more confidence in your ability to move forward. To keep trying. To celebrate the little victories when they’re reached.

They are a place to look back at… when you’re in the battles of morals and curfews and respect with a teenager. You can look back on these days when you came back from the “bottom” and took those would-be tantrums and calmed them. When you taught lessons, even if you weren’t sure they were sinking in or not. And they’ll be those times that you can say.. “I did that. And I can do this.”

 

So to those of you who may be fighting these battles, hang in there. Don’t beat yourself up for having the bad days. Take them for what they are. If you have to take a moment to let out what ever emotions you’re feeling, find the way to take that moment. Just don’t get stuck in it. You deserve the rebound and so does your little one. 

Just know you’re not alone, and that you can do this… and you will. 

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  1. susanwilliams3059@gmail.com

    September 12th, 2014 at 10:51 am

    Well said my sweet friend! And it doesn’t get easier but it is always amazing!! You nailed the sentiments and people without kids can never know that responsibility. I am back in sandyland after a month in lush, picturesque England! Feeling a huge culture shock! Thanks for your entry from my email to your Mama. It’s just the truth as I see it. Every day is a gift and if you open your eyes and have an open heart God will fill them both with wonder and understanding. Love you give peanut a foo foo hug xoxo

    Sent from my iPad

    >

  2. Toodee

    September 12th, 2014 at 11:55 am

    Welcome to parenthood, and as they grow, your battles tend to grow and get more complicated, too. Do the best you can and don’t worry, this too shall pass! Remember, as the babies turn into their next stage, they are just stretching their wings and testing the water!

  3. bmariephoto

    September 18th, 2014 at 8:45 am

    Very good reminders!!! Thanks, Toodee!!

  4. Jan Rodine

    September 12th, 2014 at 1:26 pm

    Well said!! Cold beer and ice cream at the end of the day helps too!!!

  5. welcomesue

    September 18th, 2014 at 12:05 am

    thanks for the encouragement – how come there’s no schools for parenting? (except experience??!) our youngest flies the nest next week (she will be a Duck for the next four years) Excited, a little weepy, but definitely ready (I think) God is good and makes up for my lack.

  6. bmariephoto

    September 18th, 2014 at 8:09 am

    O my gosh I can’t even imagine going through that goodbye, though I’m sure it’ll be here sooner than I think with the way time is flying! God most definitely does make up for my lack too!! Since you’ve got years of experience… just let me know when you open up that parenting school! haha. If you could share one tip to new(er) parents like me, what would it be?

  7. welcomesue

    September 18th, 2014 at 12:06 am

    ps – i was next to you at coffee w/ holley this morning. how do you like your coffee, btw? (: great photography!

  8. bmariephoto

    September 18th, 2014 at 8:09 am

    I like my coffee like I like my inspiration – strong and just a little sweet!

  9. welcomesue

    September 18th, 2014 at 9:19 am

    Oh good. Me,too. You may enjoy two fellow photographers : allisonmoore and storytree studios.

  10. bmariephoto

    September 18th, 2014 at 9:22 am

    I’ll check them out, thanks for the recommendation!

  11. Megan Walker (@MWfiresidechats)

    September 21st, 2014 at 8:15 pm

    What wonderful encouragement! I think even non-parents have those days, where you didn’t check one thing off the to-do list and couldn’t even bring yourself to brush your hair. It’s ok to have a bad day, but the key is not to dwell, just like you said. Thanks for sharing on Hump Day Happenings!

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